INFPs are a special crew. We are a group of amazing, sensitive, spiritual and creative people who oftentimes feel like aliens.
As the owner of an INFP-centered website and an INFP Life Coach, I find my encounters with our type to be pretty spectacular. I love experiencing such depth whenever I talk to an INFP. I love hearing about their dreams, their art.
And there’s something soothing about hearing the antithesis of that – the fear of trying to achieve those dreams. The disenchanted attempts at fitting in. There’s something comforting, maybe it’s my own greedy need to belong.
Or maybe it’s because I’ve heard it so often and I know it’s not a permanent state.
Regardless, I was thinking about something that would be useful to INFPs and I thought something simple would be great. And then I thought some simple reminders of why INFPs are so amazing in the first place might be in order.
You are a Gift
This world wouldn’t be the same without you. I know it seems cliche. But think about it. Your family, your friends, you community. Everything would be different without you, and none of it for the better.
You contribute to the world just by being you. You may not be a loud and gregarious person, but people notice when your energy appears… and disappears.
I have a friend who suffers from severe depression and talks about not wanting to exist. It breaks my heart. She is love, she is warmth, she is care. And she thinks she wouldn’t be missed.
Such a lie.
You are important.
We need you on this Earth.
And we need you to contribute whatever special gifts you’re meant to contribute.
You are Art
Every microsecond of your life so far is a beautifully constructed, random series of encounters between molecules. You have ups while others have downs. You have downs while others have ups. The ebs and flows of life weave together to form a breathtaking pattern at a bird’s eye view.
I was physically and emotionally abused and bullied as a child. It caused me to grow up with tweaked nerves and anxiety. I can feel so much. I can see things 360 degrees around me, because I’m always on the lookout for danger.
And yet, it’s perfect. I see people dropping things, forgetting things every day and get to help them. I see people who are in pain or injured and I get to offer assistance. I once saw a woman who couldn’t breathe at a bus stop and was the only one who stopped to call 911. They arrived just as she lost consciousness and saved her life.
I am a miracle created of the past to create a better future. And so are you.
Everything that has ever happened to you, good or bad was meant to happen.
You are Magic
You are a satellite dish for the energy of the world. You can feel when someone who’s angry walks into the room. And you can feel when someone filled with joy walks in.
You can influence other people just with your mood. People notice. They feel it.
When you were a baby, you were obsessed with learning to walk and talk. And slowly, you learned noises, followed by words. You learned to pick up your head, then crawl, then to get yourself up onto your two little feet and start taking your first steps. And you never gave up.
There’s so much magic in who you are. So much magnificence in what has gotten you to where you are right now. Every moment has been a little miracle upon a little miracle. And here you are, taking on the world and creating a future for yourself.
Every answer you need is inside of you, buried beneath 20 tons of mental bullshit, conditioning and fear. What I love about coaching is the tenant that my clients know all of the answers. I also hate that about it, because it’s hard for me to hold back on advice and teaching. I’m an information addict and love to share my wisdom. But I also love to see the magic of intuition.
You are a Magnificent, Angelic Force
Light yourself up motha fucka! If you’re dragging your body around and your heart is closed, your soul practically dead, something is wrong. Find out what lights you up and smoke it like crack.
“What the world needs now is love, sweet love.” -Jackie DeShannon
Oh. My. GOD. Does the world ever need love right now! And who better to give it than you! You are the chillest, sweetest, warmest person this world has ever seen. You are quirky and beautiful and you’ve experienced some shit. And yet, that love you give is perfect for the person next to you and the person next to them. And don’t forget for yourself.
We don’t need more self-obsessed, divisive and angry people running the world. We need love. We need heart. We need soul. We need you. Be love. Be change. Be creation. Be BIG. Be BOLD.
Spread your love everywhere, flower child.
Love Your Past
The day I saved a woman’s life because I saw her unable to breathe in the bus stop and called 911, I got on to my bus and started crying. Every single thing that happened up to that point made me who I was. Every piece of crappy childhood made me who I was. I was in the right place at the right time. I was perfectly late for my bus. I was perfectly late dropping off the kids. I was perfectly hyper aware of my surroundings. One minute later and things would have been worse off for that woman. And that was worth all of the weight of anything that happened to me. I was put here for a reason. I was able to forgive my past and love the things I had been through.
You are perfect.
The things you’ve been through are perfect.
Create a Support Structure
You are what you eat. And if you surround yourself with a bunch of dicks, then you must eat… well, you get it. No seriously, you are remarkable. And you don’t have to do everything on your own. I long tried to figure out how to get out of the emotional holes I’m prone to falling into. And it took me far too long to realize the fastest way out was to reach out to other people and get supported. Many of us aren’t comfortable with this. We think we need to fix everything on our own and we feel too alone to reach out.
I’m an HSP (Highly Sensitive Person). Sometimes it sucks. Sometimes it hurts. In my coach training program, I broke down and started crying hysterically about how much I loved my teammates and how supported I felt for the first time in my life. I was overcome with dizziness, with emotion. I could feel my fingertips pulsing and the molecules in the air around me touching every cell of my skin. I could feel the energy of the Universe exploding from me. It was the most exquisite feeling. It was so real. So human. So perfect.
Heal Your Heart
As we grow, we stack stones and barbwire on our hearts in an effort to grow and move. We “man up” and “put on our big girl pants.” We become hardened and stoic and rigid. And that’s the way we’re told we’re supposed to be.
Trying to function when you’ve built on top of a broken heart isn’t just unrealistic, it’s irresponsible.
Look, you are a supernova. You are connection. You are love. If you’ve cocooned your heart into a safe little compartment where it can’t be hurt anymore, you’re not allowing yourself to be fully expressed. Because if you can’t be hurt, you also can’t love. Or receive love.
Open it up.
Jumpstart Your Heart
Sometimes we get lost on our path. We forget who we are and what it feels like to actually feel. Sometimes we make big decisions and our hearts spark. We remember we’re alive and we know we’re on the right path. Keep it going. Spark the fire in your heart and keep it going. Know that you’re on the right path and know that you’re doing what you love.
One thing I love about coaching is feeling people shift into their hearts. It’s probably the main reason I do what I do. I get empathetically high on feeling that shift and seeing people commit to what they actually care about in life vs the default paths they’ve taken.
Invest in Yourself
You are worthy of knowledge, of growth, of love. There are many ways in which you can invest in yourself – you can spend the money you won’t let yourself spend on that course you won’t let yourself take, you can learn something you didn’t think you could learn, you could listen to your heart, you could invest your time in taking care of your health. But one way or another, honor your existence by actually investing in yourself. You matter. You deserve to grow, to exist, to thrive.
You deserve everything you can dream up.
Much love my friend!